Army of CP Higher Command Conflict Results In ‘Civil War’

MAMMOTH, Army of Club Penguin Empire – Tensions are running high in the Army of Club Penguin after a full-blown civil war erupted between the Echo and Alpha divisions. What appeared to be a harmonious and cooperative army has now come out with the truth: it was all but a facade. This shocking news might be hard to bear, but it is the sad reality as we watch the Army of Club Penguin face off in its first-ever Civil War. 

You know the saying, “Never judge a book by its cover”? Well, it rings truer than ever as we uncover the disturbing truth behind the Army of Club Penguin. It turns out that their common saying, “Green together, family forever,” was an utter lie. Commander CSY even stated in the Civil War post that “Green [is] no more.” Right now, the Army of Club Penguin has split into blue and red, Echo and Alpha, prepared to fight each other to the penguin death. This marks the start of the Army of CP Civil War.

Red goes against blue in this Civil War; there’s barely any green to be seen at all

But how did this come to be? According to the Clover Defenders’ Civil War post, it wasn’t always like this. However, the relentless bullying they subjected to each other has broken the original friendships between the higher-command. The triggering point may have been yesterday, when, mid-event, the higher-command dove into a full-blown tactic war, insulting each other and causing a general ruckus of confusion over who was leading. The result was an assortment of tactics like “BAGGED MILK NEEDS TO GO,” which deeply wounded the army’s Third in Command, Kailey, of the Echo division. In addition to this, there was a series of arguments over whether “YOUR MOT HER” jokes, which is a personal Alpha favorite, was funny or not.

ACP leader CSY and High Command Zellybelly and 2Funky3 trying to stop each others’ tactics

Eventually, the event became so chaotic that one of the army’s Second in Command, Max, decided to call off the event. Although, it seems that this was not the end of their conflict, because mere moments later, both Echo and Alpha came out with war posts, vowing to defeat the other division for their crimes. The Echo division announced the following in their declaration:

I – Captain Max – leader of the Army of Club Penguin’s Echo Division, declare war against Iron Funky’s Alpha division. This is with immediate effect.

For too long have we let the Alpha division use tactics like “FEELING BLUE?” or the dreaded “YOUR MOT HER IS…”. For too long has Funky said the Irish accent is better when the British accent is clearly superior. For too long has Zelly told Scarlett Kailey her clown costume isn’t iconic. The ‘CSY SMELLS’ jokes have gone on long enough, and even though he does smell, it’s not as bad as the Alpha’s are making out. And for far too long, the Alpha Division has not taken the time to read Falcon Mondo’s giant novels on the ACP website! No more!

While the Alpha division replied with the following in their article:

The Alpha Division hereby is gonna crush that damn Echo Division.

I- 2Iron Funky3, have devoted my life to your mot her jokes. I have not only went above and beyond with this, but me and my fellow HCOM have now come to a cross roads in which this has led to internal dispute.

For a long time, we have let Alpha accuse us of having “bad banter” or stating the Irish accent is inferior to the British? (HUH??) Furthermore, Kailey has had a bad influence on Zelly, by trying to force BAGGED MILK down her throat, alongside keeping her up?!?!? CSY has had Brad crouched over his laptop for MONTHS recruiting like a mad man. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

Determined to outdo one another, the first battle of this Civil War occurred on September 13th at 4:00 pm EST. Both divisions logged onto Bunny Hill ready for war, with the Alpha division maxing 22 while the Echo division maxed 11 more, with 33 troops online. With one Clover Defender still in the regular Army of CP uniform, they maxed a total of 55 defenders for this event. Both sides fought ferociously, but ultimately the Echo division won with a score of 2-0-1, taking the first two rooms and tying the last due to their size advantage. Regardless of the results, both sides had impressive tactics and each put up a spectacular performance.

ACP’s Echo vs. Alpha in Room 1 of the battle.

Unfortunately, even though both sides gave it their all, the current scoreboard still remains in favor of Team Echo. After the battle, CP Army Hub decided to reach out for a statement from the exhausted and war-beaten division leaders: Robot of the Alpha division and Max of the Echo division.

Robot, since the Alpha team was unfortunately defeated by the Echo team this time, do you have any thoughts to share? Most importantly, does this mean the Alpha team will be accepting the existence of bagged milk?

Echo is dumb and big call em bullies!!! Nah fr tho Echo did well and they were bigger but I believe in my Alpha troops. Comeback szn and NO NEVERRRRRR E888888

Max, since the Echo team won today, do you have any thoughts or comments? What strategies are you planning to use? Do you believe you can win this Civil War? 

Team Echo are thrilled with their first victory (of many, I’m sure) in this Civil War!! We actually broke history with the highest Echo attendance ever, and the same for Alpha, so we’re extremely happy right now. We may have won the battle, but of course the war is far from over. We have a busy week ahead of us, with battles, events and games taking place almost every day. Strategies? Absolutely none – just turn up and win And as for Rob and his denial – I’ve been there… he needs to face his demons and come to terms with the truth ! Bagged milk DOES exist. Just like the gaps in his divisions formations today x

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The first battle between the Echo and Alpha divisions may have come to an end, but this war certainly has not. Both sides seem determined to win and even more unwilling to lose. So many questions remain. Will the Echos’ bagged milk ultimately prevail? Is the British accent better, or is the Irish accent better? Are “YOUR MOT HER” jokes out of style or just in? Who will win in this Army of CP Civil War?

What do YOU think? Let us know YOUR thoughts in the comments below!

Sophie

CP Army Hub Reporter

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